What am I supposed to do now.... study more would be the wise thing to do.

Its SPM month/season/time now!!!! It has finally come!

I don't know if its because I am a teenager and my hormones are getting the best of me but suddenly I feel like all hope of getting good results are sucked out of me. And I'm not even saying straight A's ok, I mean, 8A's is good enough for me already.

But I read some blog posts by people who got good grades and their marks were all A's and B's ONLY.

http://jovylky.blogspot.com/2012/03/spm-results.html#

http://fatiguechic.blogspot.com/2012/03/spm-result-day.html

http://littlemissmeencollections.blogspot.com/2011/03/my-spm-results.html


And here I was struggling to even achieve a C in almost everything. T___T

I'm damn emo right now, let me just rant this off. Feel free to judge.

I am a stupid girl and the only reason (some) people think I am even mildly smart is JUST because I got slightly smarter than last year. And last year, I failed 5 subjects and didn't even get a B in a single one. But eventhough I am getting better than last year, I am still lacking A LOT and I am still struggling.

But I shouldn't be saying that about myself....

Because SPM hasn't ended yet and there's still a chance for good results!! The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts today.

This is my 1 year dream (?) and I will definitely strive towards it. And eventhough I may not achieve my good grades, I will still be happy because this was my effort after all, and I'm only angry when things happen that is out of my control.

Everyone, please pray for me ok? Cause I am freaking scared right now.

Haha, I just remembered something my sister said the other day. "Crystal!! You must get straight A's!" she said as she pointed her index finger to my nose. "Yeah yeah..." I sighed, rolling my eyes towards the ceiling above. "How much did Daddy invest in your studies this year?" she said with a warning tone.

Then I went to study lol. He had invested so much in my SPM!!!! Like thousands of ringgits. So, I must do well!

And, I'll pray for everyone else too! Especially SPM, STPM and O-Levels dudes. We'll win this battle together.

Afterthought : Actually, I should hope that other spm-ers would do badly so the grade will drop hoho. Such evil thoughts shouldn't even be contemplated!

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.

My greatest concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.